he time has come for the Craggy Island priests to take on their Rugged Island counterparts at the annual five a side football match but with Dougal not fit for anything beyond guarding the line flags all the players are extremely old - one in fact dying before he can make the game. Rugged Island have a secret weapon - the fitter Italian Father Romeo Sensini, who puts them in the lead. Craggy Island do eventually win but are exposed as cheats and disqualified with Ted having to pay a forfeit - kicking Bishop Brennan up the arse.

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